At Arms Length

Held at arms length 
I struggle against the current.
The expanding space between us 
is muffling and dense. 
I know that clawing the particles 
only pushes what I want away, 
yet I can’t help myself.

Abandoned. That’s how it feels 
when thoughts dwell in this space. 
Picked up, enjoyed, dropped, forgotten.
A reflection on me more than it is on you
Though the bitterness wishes you swim harder 
Over thinking, complicating our honest simplicity 
Tugging only loosens my grip, 
The internal longing causing me to slip.  

Hot faced and cold handed,
I lost balance. 
Life teaching me to let go
and practice non attachment. 
What I have is enough! 
And there it is;
That innate red power waiting 
at the pit of my spine.
An energy that knows more 
than my thoughts will allow right now.
Of wonders in the unknown 
and the potential that’s ready to seep 
through the cracks of life’s lessons.
A constellation of scarring, bruising and bustling health 
That compiles this moving vessel I inhabit.

So I stop resisting. 
Accept that control is an unachievable invention 
and how wonderfully freeing it is. 
Embracing the chaos 
Unleashing this orchestra of vibrations to disperse,
leaping into the unknown with shear faith it will catch me 
and weave me into the complex tapestry of this universe.