Cascading country roads, singing along
to some of his favourite folk songs,
damp hair entwined in my fingers,
secretly I wish something could delay us
And let us linger here in this daze of fresh lust 
But as my skin tingles, reminiscing
My bones giggle with fear dismissing
my optimism. Stretching scarring from a heart
so recently broken. A blackness in my marrow;
The dark feathers of the sparrow –
I’d love to fly away with you. 
Love twinning escape
Claiming a new place
inside one another.

Independently I find my way
and hesitate to allow him in
Inquisitively, he seems to see that about me
And sensing this space, respected, still craved,
I want—
There’s the gremlin again, chuckling at hope
Nibbling my neck, egging me on
With self neglect, self doubts
Searching for routes to run out.
This morning, I choose to stop this ache
with a duelling smile stretching my face. 
Let’s continue to dance like this, 
Daring fate to dish up a new plate
I’ve decided: It’s final.
I want you.

Perhaps my greatest gift
Is that I do not need anyone
And I’m free to choose
Free to love
Willing to lose, and lose again
If it means living truthfully
I can confidently own the fact then
That I
Want
You, fully.